The Moral Compass
Parent Conference Guide
Talking to children about sex has always been difficult for parents. It presents
many problematic questions, such as:
“Is a _______ really necessary?”
“What questions will they (my children) ask?
“Will I have to go into my _______?”
“Will I have to talk about the anatomy of it all?”
The church has the ____________, but not the _______. Parents have the
________, but aren’t delivering the _________.
God’s Plan for Sexual Purity
Society takes no __________ stand and ___________ that students will
engage in sexual activity. It approaches the subject from a physical health
standpoint, seeking to help students protect themselves from disease and
Society views s
ex, not as an ___________ builder within a committed
marriage relationship, but rather as an ________________ of passion.
God __________ the sexual union between a man and a woman.
He also created the context for this union:
God’s design for sex is to build ____________ in the relationship between a
husband and his wife.
Another portion of this blessing is the fruit of this union: ____________.
We are quick to tell people that our children are a ____________ from God,
we will do everything in our power to keep from telling our kids about the
____________ of God which resulted in their birth.
Why is that? It’s because we see sex as something dirty and wrong.
Sex becomes something taboo and dirty when it is removed
___________ ____________ of marriage.
Emphasizing the benefits
Society seeks to educate people as to the dangers associated with sexual activity
by informing them of those dangers and how to “__________” avoid them.
God seeks to hav
e people commit to purity and its benefits, which will help them
“______________” avoid any dangers.
Students will not avoid ____________ ______ because they are well acquainted
with the consequences of promiscuity. They will remain pure because they
_____________ ____ ____________, and desire its benefits.
Some of the benefits of purity are:
Waiting gives honor to God’s plan and order in your life.
Waiting is a __________ of radical allegiance to Jesus.
Waiting holds purity as a precious trea
sure, which is to be protected and preserved.
Waiting prohibits the possibility of a contracted STD or __________ _____________.
Waiting retains for a single person, within marriage, what is appropriately theirs.
Waiting refuses the worldly view that tru
e love requires _________ ______________ for
Waiting gives us power over sexual drives, opening the possibility for experiencing the
highest in sexual expression.
Waiting avoids the ___________ ___________ that comes with lost purity.
g helps us stay on a straight and narrow path, which helps us avoid contracting
other polluting traits of a decaying world.
Waiting exercises and shows a self
control, which gives us a greater sense of self
Who is responsible for communicating this
plan to students?
God says: __________!
Parents are responsible for morally educating and giving direction to their
children. Deuteronomy 6:6
“These words, which I am commanding you today,
shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently
to your sons and shall talk of
them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down
and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as
frontals on your forehead. You shall write them on the
doorposts of your house and on
Students say: __________!
Over 90% of students surveyed said that information they receive about sex
come from their parents, although less than one in three says their info concerning
sex comes from mom
How do I communicate God’s Plan?
Establish the priority
All parents seek in some way to help their children with sexual issues because
the dangers are so devastating.
It is imperative then, that as a parent, you establish the priority of
issue with your children.
You need to:
Accept God’s directive to be the ________ _____________ of your children.
Pray for God’s wisdom, timing, and _____________ ______ in teaching your
Determine to _______ according to the
principles you _________.
Accept that moral education is more about the __________ than the
Dealing with your issues
How to gain comfort in addressing the issue…
Instead of __________ over explaining the explicit physical details,
______ the opportunity to explain to your child that a great sex life is
found within the loving, encouraging purity of a committed marriage relationship.
Your past and your child’s past
The ___________ of your past or the ____________ of your past can be
help to your communication of moral truths to your child.
Don’t ___________ your past.
Your children have not been ________________ to commit your mistakes.
You do not have to go into every detail of your past. If your past was
teach about ______________. If your past was exemplary, teach about
Consider that your child may have a “past” as well.
Questions that your child may ask you
Some questions that may come up are:
What did you do?
Why can’t I mak
e my own mistakes?
What if we’re in love?
Is God just opposed to people having fun?
Different Approaches/Creating Opportunities
Sex talks that don’t work
____________ graphic anatomy lesson.
“_______ ___ ____” approach.
The bad ____________.
Employ multiple, effective techniques
Some teachable moments happen by accident.
You can design teachable moments.
Don’t break into a ___________.
Ask good ____________.
moments, often the lesson is __________ and ____________.
Q & A
The art of listening
Q & A can be powerful as a part of a __________ exchange with your
Ask ________________ questions and not “yes” or “no” questions.
Poor: “Is everything alr
ight with you and Regan?”
“Do you like her mom?”
Better: “If you were Regan’s mom, how would you handle Regan’s problems at
Ask specific, rather than general, questions.
(Note: If you use Q & A, be prepared to answer as many qu
estions as you
ask. This is an exchange, not an interrogation.)
Pick a day and time and make it a ___________.
Make it _______. (Games, music, variety)
Make it __________. (Create different atmospheres, celebrate special
firm one another)
Note: The devotion approach could be used effectively on an individual basis as well.
(Example: Meet with your teen one
one and journal together through the New
Resources for family devotions are available from many Chr
Vital attitudes and actions in approaching your child
________ _____________ is the final authority. (2 Timothy 3:16
Don’t be judgmental.
fronting. This is “as opposed to
You need to be a
_________, not a ________.
Be ______________. Talking to your child about sex is not a “one
(Parents & Students)
What kind of person will I date?
What is the ____________ age for dating?
t are the guidelines for ________ dates or ________________ dates?
What are acceptable and unacceptable places to go?
What is my ___________?
What are the guidelines for my ________ ________?
What are the guidelines for what I can _________?
What are the guidelines for my ____________?
Sometimes a written contract can be used to clearly articulate the guidelines
for acceptable and unacceptable behavior, and to outline the consequences for
breaking the contract.
________ of people to date
Length of dates
Determine quantity of time spent alone
______ _________ places
________ Rules (Time spent on phone; calling if there is trouble or a
change in plans, e
_________________ for breaking contract
Parent Response (Include statements that will address such issues as how
parents react to situations, waiting until the next morning to ask
Optional: 40 Hour Rule
A person has to spend 40 h
ours getting to know
the parents of the person they are wanting to date
__________________ regular attendance
__________ ____ Child
Making it possible
The key element in a child’s determination to pursue purity is the parent’s
personal involvement in their child’s relationships.
Don’t be a _________________. That’s not involvement. That’s being a
nuisance. And it doesn’t communicate purity.
Be a _____________. Open your home. Create times for you to observe
hild in relationship and for the person they are dating to observe
Options for relationships
Dating tends to be more casual than courtship. Dating
relationships may vary from casual friendships to serious prospects for
ating serves as a way to get to know people. The knock
on dating is that an emotional and physical intimacy develops too
quickly in these casual, non
Courtship usually springs from a friendship which has the
grow into something more. It is a committed relationship
intended to result in marriage.
Good principles to apply to either choice
___________ and _______________ the approval of parents
before entering into a romantic relationship.
Waiting to start a
__________ relationship until you are at the age
where you could consider getting married.
Entering into the relationship with the ____________ ___
_____________ the idea of marriage, not just going out for fun
with no serious intentions.
Setting high st
andards for ____________ ___________.
Modeling the behavior
If you are married, the relationship you have with your spouse should
model the type of ________________ and ____________ you would
want your son or daughter to have with his or her future sp
If you are a single parent, the relationships you model in your dating life
should reflect the purity you desire to see in your student’s life.
The standards are not different for you in regard to purity. What you
__________, ____________ ____,
take part in, all reflect the
pass on. If you desire to pass on ___________, you
will have to model it.
Encouraging good decisions
Too often we ___________ at bad decisions, but fail to encourage our
children when they make good ones.
Find both ___________ and
______________ ways to express your appreciation and respect for a